How to
by eyemblacksheep
Spanking is one of the most common forms of BDSM activity.
It is a wonderfully versatile activity that can be enjoyed by everyone from newbie/beginners up to experienced veterans. Whilst there can be a range of implements and equipment that can be used, one of the beauties of spanking is it requires nothing you wouldn’t already have at home.
You also don’t even need a partner! Spanking yourself is possible and can be fun.
To give a little idea on how common spanking is, there is evidence of it in history dating thousands of years.
The Karma Sutra (circa 400 BC) is an early example of recommending spanking to enhance sexual arousal.
There is also ‘The Tomb of the Floggings’ which was discovered in the tombs of Tarquinia, which shows frescoes depicting spanking scenes from the Eturscan civilisation (dates seem unsure but this civilisation was between 800 BC and 4 AD)
Perhaps its history does make it one of the fetishes that is least taboo to “try”.
People assume that spanking is enjoyed as some form of throwback to childhood or trauma however, people enjoy it for such a variety of reasons. There is no one dominant reason why people enjoy spanking.
For some, childhood throwbacks may be true. Older submissives at school events have said that the corporal punishment angle takes them back to a time when they were first going through puberty or when the only thing to really fear was getting the cane.
For others, hand spanking can be extra intimate. The sensation can be arousing especially close to so many erogenous zones.
There can be an element of power or control (either giving it up or having it).
Some people may even reach subspace with it.
And, of course, the sting on the backside afterwards can be a reminder of a fun activity.
There are actually many different ways to spank someone!
Whether it’s over the knee spanking, where the sub is usually bent over your knee. Or perhaps they are bent over a sofa, bed, or other furniture. Whether someone is restrained, strapped down, or not.
Whether it is discipline/punishment (but always within consensual play!) some form of role play, or just for fun. It can be part of sex, or seperate depending on your relationship dynamic.
Whilst bare hand is as good a tool to strike somebody with as anything, some people enjoy other toys or implements.
This could include; slippers, bath brush, paddles, flogger, canes or more. I was once spanked with a flag pole!
What may be important if it is part of role play is that the implement fits the role play you are doing. For example a tawse, ruler or cane for a school role play.
It might be difficult to know your levels if you’ve never spanked, or been spanked, before.
Levels can be either how much you enjoy, or how much you can take.
A very important thing to consider is like any activity in kink that it’s not a contest to see who can take the most, but some people do like to push themselves if their Dominant enjoys it.
Certainly when doing this the first time, playing where you both enjoy is most important.
Discussing in advance that you would like to try will help with the planning better than in the spur of the moment.
This discussion could include that you want to try spanking, what to use, if there’ll be any role play or not. The use of safewords, or any other words that should or shouldn’t be used.
For example one person might like words being used like ‘naughty’, ‘dirty’, ‘slut’ etc. but someone else would not.
PLAY TIME : WARMING UP
When you come to play, it is always best to start with a warm up.
Whilst experienced players may go in hard from cold, this is not recommended if you are new.
To warm up, start off lightly. This could be with your hands or a gentle implement. You can see the sub is getting warmed up as their skin is getting flushed and red.
This could be a good time to both communicate if you are happy to go harder.
CONTINUING AND CONCLUDING PLAY
After warm-up it’s possible to go a little harder or use harder implements.
Particularly if you are new to spanking it would be a good idea to check in with your partner as you go to ensure you are happy to continue. While there would be a safeword (and the universal safeword is ‘red’) to end if things get too much, the objective is not to make someone safeword!
The Dominant can and should stop at any time when either they have had enough or feel the sub has had too much.
Remember, you can always come back and do more another day, you can’t undo what has been done.
Keep strikes to the bottom. It’s more resilient than you’d think. But be careful about breaking the skin, if this happens it is important to treat the cuts to avoid infection.
AFTER PLAY
There is a good chance that after care may be required; so understanding their after care needs is important.
We have a great article about After Care on the TG website!
At a later time you can also discussed what was enjoyed, or not enjoyed, to make things even better next time.
eyemblacksheep is a blogger and fetish film producer – you can check his website here (www.eyemblacksheep.com) and follow on Twitter @eyemblacksheep
Ministry of Sound
Electrowerkz
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